Three Friendships Every Person Needs – #Sermon of the Week


(Beausejour Church – Pastor Chris Jordan)

REVIEW LAST WEEK: We starting looking at David last week and Psalm 23 – learning how we can experience Jesus as the Good Shepherd in our darkest valleys.

QUESTION: Did you ever wonder how David – the runt of the litter, youngest of eight brothers, a poor shepherd boy – rose to become the greatest King of Israel?

  • He had a lot of opposition: His dad, his oldest brother, and the previous king (Saul) all told him that he was too young and incapable of doing anything great.
  • Fortunately, he had a few key people in his life that helped him to become great.

OPENING TEXT: “He who walks with wise men will be wise, But the companion of fools will be destroyed.” (Prov. 13:20).

  • Show me your FRIENDS, and I’ll show you your FUTURE.
  • INTERACTIVE: Write down the names of your five closest most intimate friends.
  • They say most people have 1-2 friends like this. 25 years ago average = 6 good friends.

FRIENDSHIP DEFINED: A friend is someone you may or may not know well who accepts your friend request on Facebook. This person is born to like and comment on your posts to make you feel good about yourself. (Proverbs 18:24 FBV, Facebook Version). (Credit: Craig Groeschel).

  • “A man who has friends must himself be friendly, But there is a friend who sticks closer than a brother.” (Prov. 18:24, NKJV).
  • Like it or hate it, social media has redefined friendship. Ten years ago, would you have called up your friends to tell them what you had for breakfast? Now we post pics on FB!

THE BIG IDEA: When we go through life’s valleys, we need good friends who will call forth our destiny, encourage us in the Lord, and speak the truth to us.



  1. Friends Speak Affirming Words to One Another:

“So he sent and brought him in. Now he was ruddy, with bright eyes, and good-looking. And the Lord said, “Arise, anoint him; for this is the one!” Then Samuel took the horn of oil and anointed him in the midst of his brothers; and the Spirit of the Lord came upon David from that day forward.” (1 Sam. 16:12-13, NKJV).

  • Samuel came along at just the right time to change David’s destiny.
  • Do you have someone who believes in you and challenges you to be better?
  • TESTIMONY: Encouraged in my weekly prayer times with Pastor Darrell. Prophetic!
  1. Friends Challenge One Another:

“As iron sharpens iron, So a man sharpens the countenance of his friend.” (Prov. 27:17, NKJV).

  • We need friends that will challenge us to be the best we can be.
  • TESTIMONY: David – I challenge him in his Bible study, he challenges me in P90X.


  1. Friends Love at All Times:

“Now when he had finished speaking to Saul, the soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul. Saul took him that day, and would not let him go home to his father’s house anymore. Then Jonathan and David made a covenant, because he loved him as his own soul. And Jonathan took off the robe that was on him and gave it to David, with his armor, even to his sword and his bow and his belt.” (1 Sam. 18:1-4, NKJV).

  • David and Jonathan’s was an unlikely friendship – Jonathan a prince, David a fugitive.
  • David and Jonathan loved each other with God’s love. They loved God & each other.
  • They made a covenant – there was a commitment and faithfulness to their friendship.
  • “A friend is always loyal (loves at all times – NKJV), and a brother is born to help in time of need.” (Prov. 17:17, NLT).
  • We need to learn how to love at all times – to be loyal and faithful in our friendships.
  1. Friends Stick up for One Another:

1 Now Saul spoke to Jonathan his son and to all his servants, that they should kill David; but Jonathan, Saul’s son, delighted greatly in David… 4 Thus Jonathan spoke well of David to Saul his father, and said to him, “Let not the king sin against his servant, against David, because he has not sinned against you, and because his works have been very good toward you…” 6 So Saul heeded the voice of Jonathan, and Saul swore, “As the Lord lives, he shall not be killed.” (1 Sam. 19:1,4,6, NKJV).

  • David was in danger from King Saul, but Jonathan stood up for him.
  • When our friends are in trouble, we need to step in and help them out.
  • If you have a friend who engages in a self-destructive habit or addiction, say something!
  1. Friends Encourage One Another in the Lord:

“And David stayed in strongholds in the wilderness, and remained in the mountains in the Wilderness of Ziph. Saul sought him every day, but God did not deliver him into his hand. So David saw that Saul had come out to seek his life. And David was in the Wilderness of Ziph in a forest. Then Jonathan, Saul’s son, arose and went to David in the woods and strengthened his hand in God. And he said to him, “Do not fear, for the hand of Saul my father shall not find you. You shall be king over Israel, and I shall be next to you. Even my father Saul knows that.” (1 Sam. 23:14-17, NKJV).

  • As Christians, we need to encourage one another in the Lord. We can do this by praying with and for each other, and encouraging each other with God’s Word.
  • Jonathan encouraged David with his destiny in God:  “You shall be king!”
  • “So encourage each other and build each other up, just as you are already doing.” (1 Thess. 5:11, NLT).


  1. Friends Speak the Truth to One Another in Love:

In Second Samuel 11, David got into trouble – he committed adultery and murder, and tried to cover it up. When we mess up, we need friends who will speak the truth to us!

“Then Nathan said to David, “You are the man!” (2 Sam. 12:7, NKJV).

  • “An open rebuke is better than hidden love! Wounds from a friend are better than many kisses from an enemy.” (Prov. 27:5-6, NLT).
  • David’s response: “For the choir director: A psalm of David, regarding the time Nathan the prophet came to him after David had committed adultery with Bathsheba. Have mercy on me, O God, because of your unfailing love. Because of your great compassion, blot out the stain of my sins… Create in me a clean heart, O God. Renew a right spirit within me. Do not banish me from your presence, and don’t take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me again the joy of your salvation, and make me willing to obey you.” (Psalm 51:1, 10-12, NLT).
  • When was the last time you had a friend who loved you enough to tell you the truth?
  1. Friends are Open and Honest with One Another:

“Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.” (James 5:16).

  • If we can’t humble ourselves and be honest with our friends, we won’t change!
  • Your strengths will impress people, but your weaknesses will connect with people.
  • TESTIMONY: The message I got the most feedback from last year = my struggles.
  1. Friends are Present for One Another:

“Let us think of ways to motivate one another to acts of love and good works. And let us not neglect our meeting together, as some people do, but encourage one another, especially now that the day of his return is drawing near.” (Heb. 10:24-25, NLT).

  • This is one of the biggest needs for friendships in our social-media saturated world today!
  • STORY: At Tim’s last week during Tori’s practice, saw mom, son & daughter at a table and all of them were on their phones or iPods. They were together, but not present.
  • We need to get together and be present if we’re going to inspire one another!

CHALLENGE: Let’s be friends who call forth God’s destiny in others, encourage one another in the Lord, and speak the truth to one another in love.

Building Friendships in the Valleys


About Chris Jordan

Husband. Father. Author. Pastor. High School Bible Teacher. Follower of Jesus. And I enjoy a good cup of coffee!
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